The bespectacled, lab-coat wearing geek isn’t most people’s idea of a hot date. But, with nothing better to do on a Friday evening, and perhaps hoping to improve their chances, they’ve delved deep into the minds of more fortunate people to find out what causes them to fall in love. They’ve found some surprising results with can help us all to find romantic success.
#1 Copy what your date is doing
We instinctively mimic other people all the time, picking up their turns of phrases, copying their posture and imitating their mannerisms. But we rarely notice we’re doing it or that other people are doing it to us. Mimicking is our brain’s way of having a sincere conversation with somebody else’s brain. People who mimic more are better liked, and we even find we agree with their arguments more often.
Researchers in France (of course) have discovered that copying what a date is doing increases your chance of getting a second one. They coached women taking part in a speed dating session to unobtrusively imitate their partner’s speech and body language. So if the man they were talking to asked ‘You really do that?’ they replied ‘Yes, I really do that!’ instead of just ‘Yes’. If he scratched his ear, they should scratch their own a few seconds later. The training paid off: when the women mimicked they were rated as sexier by the men and received more offers of a follow up.